Corb's Notebook

[corbett]

My notebook of all my randomness and what-not.

[corbett]

Said you'd always be there
You promised, this I swear
Spoke every word clear and true
Got me to say I love you
But it was all just a game
I was just another name
You took my heart
Just to tear it apart
Still you say
You loved me along the way
I know i'm young
But i'm not that dumb
All you wanted was sex
After that you got another ex
Then along came him
With a goofy smile, and a silly grin
He assumed I was shy
Didn't know about you and I
Making attempts to take my heart
But I wouldn't let him, i was on guard.
One day, he took my chin
tilted it up so i looked up at him
Please, oh, please baby girl,
can't you give us a whirl?
I broke down there
It was more than I could bare
I told him about every guy
Spoke to him of their every lie
How they left me dead inside
How i just wanted to run and hide
I was crying now, but on and on I went
Until i felt his lips, they tasted like mint
His arms wrapped around me tight
He held me the whole night
Whispered gently to me
that he truly wanted us to be
Quietly told me he'd wait and wait
until he could finally get me to date
Said he'd fight for this girl
Wanted to make her his whole world
And on that broken night
all the while he held me tight
I let go of you
and held onto him

[corbett]

Her heart was broken
His heart as well--
Two hearts awoken,
Oh, what a tale to tell.

She was torn to two
He was destroyed by one
Fate came as it was due
Their paths were spun.

Her heart was broken
His heart as well--
Two hearts awoken,
Oh, what a tale to tell.

She bumped into him
And their hearts shed the burr,
And perhaps this was all on whim
He told the world he loved her

Her heart no longer broken
His heart followed as well—
Two hearts awoken,
Oh, what a tale to tell.

[corbett]

Screaming a wretched song,
The dove’s feather fades to black.
Neither knows not where they belong
Nor why both find the drawback.

Lost in a world of desolation,
The brightest of which is melancholy.
Is there no resolution--
But just this hopeless heartless volley?

Empty are their glasses of faith
Watching dreams die--
Let them convert to wraith
And float by, and by…

[corbett]

She sits alone in the midnight mists,
And cries pain filled tears.
His deadly hands are bunched into fists,
The bringer of all her fears.

The fair maiden cries out in torment,
The ghastly villain snickers
Can someone undo this moment?
Or will he forever hold her.

The fight is draining,
The once quiet girl screams in the night…
He is gaining--
Please someone shed the light.

Hope falls to the floor
Slain down by the beast
Malice haunts at the door
And upon her it shall feast.

[corbett]

And I started to wonder if i was the Corpse Bride.
My dreams were shattered knowing Romeo and Juliet Lied.
I decided love belonged in a crematoria.
Then, I heard the story of Victor and Victoria.
Yet, i never could truly believe in it.
For them to love, the Bride took a hit.
So I ran to the insanity palace;
The love of Mad Hatter and his Alice.
But still I wanted something more;
I ran to the land of horror.
There I cried, and there I wept;
But I found the truest love yet
It was in the graveyard valley;
the tale of Jack and Sally.

[corbett]

Maybe everyone’s right…
But baby, it’s just been a late night..
So you say.
Still, it’s growing day, by day.
If you’re lying just say it,
‘cause I’m really getting tired of this shit.

Everyday it ends the same;
Crying on the phone, who’s to blame?
Guess I should’ve listened;
But I didn’t and now the tears just glisten.
I hang up the phone.
I think I’d rather be alone.

You’re begging please.
There you go down on your knees.
Every part of me is screaming, leave.
But I stand there and wipe my tears with my sleeve.
You’re saying they’re the ones that lie
What am I supposed to buy?

I really don’t know anymore.
But I'm never walking out that door.

[corbett]

"You're only given a little spark of madness. You mustn't lose it.”
-Robin Williams


What if I told you a story like no other? What if I took you on a fun, magical, story, ride? Well, I am not Walt Disney; Sit back, zip your mouth, and pay attention.

The puppet master, that’s what they call me. They say I rob people of their souls and put them in my puppets. They say I am crazy. They call me insane. I just smile and wave.

My hair is greasy, and the color of coal. I am as skinny as a skeleton with hands like bones. My eyes are a pale blue. Their whites are really yellow. I smirk and smiley a toothy grin, and that is how you know it’s time to begin.

The curtains rise on the stage bright as day. The colors of the lights, they swirl and change, red then white. My puppets they laugh, they cry, they dance, they sing. All just for me. I control them, I am the master! My thin and pale lips part. I laugh. It is a wretched laugh really, squeaky and high pitched like a screaming cat.

The show moves so smooth, like a swift river runs through its banks. The crowd roars. Everything is perfect, but WAIT! There is a man in a blue suit, and he does not cheer, he glares, he mocks. My brows drop in confusion, the light falls from my eyes. How can this be? How can he not laugh and cheer? I twirl the puppets into each other. A smile does not even flicker onto his face. My blood it boils. My blood is lava. How dare he not enjoy my show! HOW DARE HE IGNORE MY PUPPETS!

A trumpeting puppet becomes tangled up with a drummer girl. Lights spark and flare. They fade away, just dying suns. My anger it grows and swells. The man he laughs, a mocking laugh. A once perfect show falls to madness.

There is a pit inside of me. There is a black hole inside me. The joy has fled from my veins. My pale face grows hot. I clench my bony fist shaking it with rage. I feel my lips parting. A rasping voice, my voice, floats across the stage, across the audience. “My friend, my friend! Please join in. Oh please, oh please. Come dance with me.”

An eerie smoke slithers into the room. The crowd becomes swallowed in it, and screams resound. I can make out figures running here, running there. The shadows slam into each other. People are crying, but when the smoke clears…..Oh when the smoke clears… The man is gone.

On my stage everything is back to perfection. The lights are bright, and puppets twirl. The best dancer of all wears a blue suit.

[corbett]

No one believes in him..No wonder he's given up.
I've seen it in his eyes...It's just anger and pain and fear.
He rolls his head, he pins his ears, he bucks and rears.
He's scared beyond all reason, and no one seems to give a damn.
They yell and scream, bitch and moan, aim and slam.
He's all alone...
I think he's been chilled to the bone.

I stare at him, he at me..
This beast i am to ride.
This beast he tries to hide..
I stare some more..I'm feeling torn..
Staring into his eyes..so forlorn..
The people they say
"Glad you offered to ride this rotten thing..Next year, We're gonna sell him."
Silently I nod my head, i can not reply to them.

I took a halter, I took a rope.
He glared without any hope.
I opened the gate,
it creaked...I say "I know you're angry mate."
He's backed into the corner, ears layed flat.
I speak again, a quiet tone, almost silent at that.
"Baby...."
And there's a look of dulling anger...maybe just maybe...

Days go by...
We ride and ride...
He's scared of the arena, he's terrified of the bit.
It's a slow trip.
Day by day..
We go this way..
a slow walk, a slow trot..
"Boy, this summer is hot"
I talk to him like he's a friend.
and in the end..
I know he is.


Summer turns to fall.
This day I'll always recall.
You didn't look at me with fear,
you didn't buck you didn't rear.
You nickered, and came to me.
"Oh baby...was this meant to be?"


And now it's next year.
I try to hide my fears, my tears...
These people they say..
"That horse is a beast, a menance, an ugly hellish monster.
He's got to go away."
I think you know..
Yes, you know...
You know that no one ever believed in you.
But I do.
I argue and say what i know is the truth..
You've been abused, you've been used.


They don't care.
You got to go...and i don't dare...
But no i do..I did..
To my parents I went and said..
"It's been ten years....you promised me this.."
Silence i am met by...
I don't want you too rot and die...
Empty and alone...
Chilled to the bone...
The silence is relentless..terrifying and empty...
They said "No he's gimpy..."
They had heard the rumors, the lies...
and alone i can see you die..
I calmly say,
"You said I could pick. This is my horse. You promised me at four."
It's been a day...
It's been a month...
It's been a few...
Guess I was the only one to believe in you.

But I hope that's enough.
guess it's love...
I believed in you.
you believed in me.
So it was meant to be...